1. Submission is mutual: Ephesians 5:21 says we should submit to each other in the fear of God. This is a dual command, and should be practiced among Christians regardless of marriage relationship.
2. Wifely Submission is Commanded: Eph. 5:22-23 says women should submit to their husbands AS they submit to the Lord. If a woman is not submissive to her husband, probably she needs to be held accountable by other women or married couples to her submission to the Lord. If we (as women) believe we are "entitled to be obeyed", we probably aren't submitting to the Lord as He has commanded. Find yourself an accountability partner and GET IN PRAYER. GET IN THE WORD. Get with JESUS.
3. Feelings do matter, but they CAN'T rule: I think (and you know my struggles personally) that many women FEEL (and that can be a dangerous word) loved when their husbands say he will do X and then does, or when shes asked him to do x and then he does. It isn't so much about being "obeyed", its about feeling loved. Ephesians 5 goes on to tell husbands to love their wives as Christ loves the church. This is an agape love. This is sacrificial love. Its sacrificing time, energy, money...but mostly SELF. Jesus gave HIMSELF, and trust me, he wasn't comfortable. If you aren't comfortable loving your wife the way she needs to be love, CHECK YOURSELF. Women, if you husband is bending over backwards to meet your needs, NOTICE IT. Maybe you need to decrease so your marriage can increase (John 3:30)?
4. Men aren't Large and In Charge: Men (and this is a VERY BIG GENERALIZATION) in the Christian Church, and in general, have stopped being Christian leaders in their home. God gives a hierarchy which has been sorely upset in our culture (1st Cor 11:3). God intends man to submit to the God Head, then the wife to submit to the husband and God, then children and employees to follow. When there is no spiritual leader in the home because the husband does not submit himself to the God Head, there is an incorrect hierarchy.
5. We're not Nagging. For real: I'm really tired of men saying women nag. Read Proverbs. Unless you're ready to move to the attic, or you'd rather undergo Chinese Water Torture than listen to your wife, she's probably not "nagging". There is an underlying idea that women who ask their husband to do something more than once, or in a certain way, or has EXPECTATIONS for her husband is a nag. God calls us to be ACCOUNTABLE to each other in marriage. Iron on Iron as my husband should be my best friend. When I ask something of my husband, I'm not asking him to OBEY, I'm asking him to be accountable as my spiritual leader, spiritual partner, equal yolk, and sharpening tool. If you think I'm nagging, CHECK YOURSELF as a spiritual leader, then TALK WITH ME about our expectations in our marriage.
6. It's help MEET, not help MATE. Learn your Hebrew. : Women need to give up this "feminism" crap. I'm not created to be the same as a man. If I were created the same, there would be no purpose FOR man, and THAT is NOT what God intended. Also, Chruch, we're not a helpMATE, helper, companion, we're a help MEET. Help, in this sense is an Ezer. It's used 21 times in the KJV, and generally describes God as a savior to His people in war. Kenegdo is only used ONCE. One time. In the Bible. And it is to describe Eve/woman/wife. We are special. Unique. NOT men. Stop trying to be them and embrace who God made YOU to be.
7. Last one, I promise...WOMEN, GET OVER IT : So, I'm reading about women in the Bible, and I'm reading about women's roles and attitudes, and what not, and I come across Proverbs 31. I've read it before, I've quoted it before. Read it real quick. It'll take 5 minutes. Now, please note who helps her through the field buying and oil lamp using and clothing of her household.....wait for it.....NO ONE. She just does it. it's her job. Her husband, if you notice, is NOT WITH HER. Your job....MY JOB....is to submit to my husband REGARDLESS of if I feel loved, if my husband performs as the spiritual head, or if I want to.
