Some real gems from the table tonight:

"The elements that make your heart beat are oxygen, love, water, and milk!"

"I have a cave man joke..ready?  'Hit Alia with club.  Make Gannon laugh!!!!'"

I need crayons...

Gannon came home from school today very proud of himself for the "green stamp" he got for his behavior. He came right inside to get his homework done.  Once it was found, he sat down at the desk in his room to do a few pages.  I went downstairs to start dinner (see koenigslivebetter.blogspot.com for more info on our new lowfat lifestyle).  

Not 15 minutes into my preparation with only one interruption to feed the baby, Gannon came downstairs and presented me with a note.  It read as follows:

Six Flags

Kage (far right in the pic) to Siri (next to Kage) while riding the airplanes at Six Flags:
"Back in the day, there was only one steering wheel on the plane"
Keep in mind, Kage is 6 and Siri is 3... how long ago is "back in the day" !?!?!?!?!

Forgery

Gannon is in 1st grade.  Each day they get a color: Apple stamp for EXCELLENT, Green for good, Yellow for had some problems, Blue for really not so good, and Red for WOW, you had to work at being that difficult!  The calendar is to be initialed daily by a parent so that parents  Today, Gannon came home with a green.  As parents, we were of course, pleased.  Gordon went to sign it for the day, but oddly, the folder was already signed with a VERY close replica of his signature.  I was questioned first, but I quickly pointed out that as one of his parents, I would probably have signed my OWN name.  We went to the next most probable source.
"Yup.  I did that.  It looks JUST like daddys!"

So, forgery, A+...we just need to work on an alibi.

Triglycerides

Me: Gordon, you really need to watch your fats, especially since your triglycerides are so high!
Gannon:  Yah, Dad, and Sugar.  Sugar is soooooo bad for you!
Me:  Whatever Gannon, you eat a TON of sugar
Gannon:  That's just because I love it.  Sugar is sooooooo tasty!

A few since the baby...

Gannon points at the baby and says: Can that thing share my room since it's pretty cute?

Gordon watching McClintock:  Gannon, come down stairs and learn to be a man!
Gannon:  Awwwwww, why?!!?!?!?!?!  Why do I always have to come down stairs to learn to be a man!?!?! (*Watches show for about thirty seconds) So is that how you be a man?  Ok.  Good. (goes back upstairs)

April 3rd:
Gannon and I were snuggling before bed, and he asked me if it was too late to hold baby Seth. I told him yes and started crying. My sweet boy said "Dont cry, mommy, please don't cry. You are beautiful.". What an amazing son I have!

Cat Vagina

Gannon was brushing his teeth, looked up and said.... - "I'm so sad that the cat doctor cut out Willows vagina. Now I don't ever get to have a cute little kitten."...and continued brushing.  Sometimes I wish I knew what was going on in his head, but most of the time, I'm glad I don't.

Twisty Screw Driver

Gannon came running into our room from playing his favorite Wii game and presented his left thumb to me.  From there, the conversation went like this:
Gannon:  Mommy, I need a band-aid for the booboo on my thumpkin.
Me:  Well, maybe you should take a break from playing the game and your thumb won't hurt.
Gannon:  No, mommy, its not from the game.  Its from the twisty screw driver.
Me:  What twisty screw driver?
Gannon:  I just was using a twisty screw driver to make a hole in the wall.
Me:  Oh.  Why?
Gannon:  So I could hang a picture up on the wall.
Me:  What picture?
Gannon:  *Deep sigh*  I still have to MAKE it, mom!  *under his breath* Gosh!  So, I guess if you aren't going to get me a band-aid, that will be all.
He left and went back to playing his game.