Deep thoughts with Annika and Siri

We're currently driving from Galesburg, Illinois back to our home in Texas. The weather has been... questionable for December in the mid west.  Right this very moment, I'm in the bathroom of a Kum-n-go, taking the advice of my grandmother, "if you have the chance to try to go, you should at least try.".
I walked past a conglomeration of cheap redneck souvenir options and into the overly florally deodorized particle board- paneled stall.  Siri had already locked herself in the smaller of the two stalls and I could see her feet swinging as she sat.  I pulled down Annikas pants and sat her on the stained, plastic toilet seat.  I tried not to think of what else had occupied that spot today.
Siri and Annika often have bathroom conversations, but this one was more profound than normal. 
" Annika, these bathrooms are wood, and that means they are nice. And expensive.  Do you know what wood is made of? "
Don't laugh, don't laugh, don't laugh... She was so serious with her delivery...
"Annika, this wood... It's made from TREES.  wood is made from TREES, Annika.  Remember that the wood you see in nature, it's made from TREES.".
Annikas eyes lit up.  She wiped and got off the potty using entirely too much palm-to-toilet contact for my comfort.  She touched the paneling.  " oOoooOoOooh!  Trees are made of WOOD...."

We still have 10 hours to drive...

And, Annika probably has Ebola.

Pink and Tap Dance

Gannon has his moments.  This morning, I watched with pride as my sweet boy lead 40 people at See You At the Pole.  He was thoughtful in his prayer.  He was mature in his presentation.  He prayed for his administration, for his teachers, and for unbelievers in his school to come to know Christ.  I didn't wear mascara to the event for obvious reasons. 

Have you ever noticed, though, that days with your kids can be pendulum-esc?  By the time we left Bible Study this evening, I was ready to string him UP a pole.  

To understand Gannon, you have to understand his slightly obsessive personality.  He finds something and he LATCHES. Like a leach.  For a long.....long......long........long...........time, sucking the life out of every person, thing, idea, or thought in contrast or contention to his obsession.  

Recently (for the past number of months), My Little Pony has been the "rock" in his brain.  If there can be a hyper-focus of an obsession, Pinkie Pie has been Gannon's.  The color pink is his new favorite.  He wan't to try out for the character of Pinkie Pie.  His Sunday School class were making sheep, so he colored his pink and named it Pinkie Pie.  He wants a bed set.  My nine year old son wants a Pinkie Pie bed set.

  

Please understand that him liking My Little Pony (MLP for short) and he being a "Bronie" does not bother me.  What bothers me is the constant search for ANYTHING that might be even REMOTELY related to MLP and fixating on it to the detriment of everything else.  Tonight, at Bible Study, he convinced several kids to bring him pink shirts next week so that he could wear pink every day. 

He sees pink everywhere.  He sings the MLP theme song in the shower.  He saves up money for the minis.  Annika (2) and Siri (6) were not this bad about Frozen.  And Frozen was Baaaaaad. 

 Tonight was the end of it for me.  I don't know what specifically broke the camels back, but I was done.  I started yelling.  

Me:  "I AM SO TIRED OF THIS OBSESSION!  I CAN'T EVEN HAVE A NORMAL CONVERSATION WITH YOU BECAUSE MY LITTLE PONIE TAKES OVER"

Gannon:  "Actually, PINKIE PIE takes over!  I CAN'T GET IT OUT OF MY BRAIN!"

Me: "Gannon, it's OVER.  This obsession is DONE WITH.  I can't handle your disobedience and arguing over a TV SHOW!  You need to find a new hobby!"

I said that, and this happened....

(scroll past the picture)

Gannon:  " A NEW HOBBY!?!?!?!?!?!?!  LIKE WHAT?!?!?!?  I DON'T EVEN KNOW!?!!?!??!? THERE ARE TOO MANY CHOICES!!!!! LIKE CROCHET, OR TAP DANCE!!!!!! HOW WILL I EVER PICK!!?!?!??!"

I stopped the conversation to take the picture and tell you about this.  Crochet or tap dance..... 

I'm sure he'll find something.  

*This was published with Gannon's permission

Gannon, tequila, and a Mexican jail

I love to travel.  Loooovvvveeeee.  I love to plan experience, to meet new people, taste new foods... I have wanderlust and I have it bad.  You should check out my travel blog The Jolly Camper.  It's less funny and more camp-ey.

Tonight, we had a great time with our friends, the Warrens.  They are our pastors, our dear friends, our kids best friends....really more like family.  We like to do stuff with the Warrens, and we refer to it as the "WarNig *event*".  We've had the WarNig Christmas, the WarNig Camping Trip, the WarNig Thanksgiving, a WarNig 4th...The WarNig "bottomless cup" hockey game.....you get the idea.  So tonight, there   were drinks, laughs, and trip planning.

The kids played upstairs while the adults brainstormed. We had initially tried to plan a camping trip for the first few weeks of October, but we kept having "oh, yah, we have *insert event here* that day.  So, no October camping trip.  Somehow, Mexico came up.  Mexico.  I've never been to Mexico!  I think running the Beach to Bay Marathon Relay in Corpus Christi is the closest I've been to our southern neighbors.  Mexico came up, and somehow, between 4 exhausted adults, a bottle of McAllen 18, a cup of coffee, and midnight conversation, a camping trip to Padre Island National SeaShore with a day trip to Playa Bagdad was scheduled.  SQUEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  A trip to put on my count down!  (Yes, we're leaving the continent for Spring break, and YES we're finishing up the lower 48 states this summer...but a CLOSE trip!  Fewer than three digits in the number!!!!!)

We departed the Warrens with as much excitement as two families totaling 12 people can muster at near midnight.  Lists were swirling in my head.  Packing...weather in Mexico in November...food....leaving on a Friday after school....Kids birth certificates, I probably need to order a few more copies...I started thinking out loud.  I think out loud, loudly.

Gannon caught on.
"MEXICO!?!?!?!  WE'RE GOING TO MEXICO!?!?!?!?!"

So, the way Gannon processes things is unusual.  If you've read more than one of these blog posts, you've probably figure that out.

"Yup!  All of us!  In November.  With the Warrens."
It wasn't immediate excitement.  You could almost hear the wheels turning.  What. Would. He. Say.

"Well, I hope I don't end up in a Mexican jail from drinking too much of that drink you warned me about."

I have no recollection of warning him about tequila, but I can honestly say, I
feel like this was a parenting win.    

SIXTY NINE DAYS!!!!!!!!!!!!

Pee and Boogers

Annika is a fairly cute 2 year old.  She's strong willed, articulate, and passionate.  She's been dubbed "the dictator" by the older two for her finger pointing-firm speaking, which she adamantly denies participating in.  She's stubborn.  OOOOOooooooohhhhhh is she stubborn.

Potty training has been a beast.  Her vehement denial of using a bathroom or pull ups left me damp and crying more than once.  This was one of those times.

Participating in team building has been an important...no...essential portion of campus transition.  I'm a school nurse.  That's my full time gig.  I still dabble at the hospital on weekends and holidays, but school is what I love most.  Moving from high school to elementary has proved interesting.  Pregnancy scares, fights, STD's, and illicit drugs have been replaced by anaphylactic peanut reactions and lost teeth.  Getting to know my admin team is imperative to effective communication for the well being of the campus.  

Tonight, we met for team building at a local taco joint.  I got the kids bean and cheese tacos and threw quarters at them to keep them quiet on the claw machine so I could enjoy a few quiet minutes over nachos and a beverage.  None the less, they made their every-3-minute rounds to make sure I knew Gannon had a drink of Siri's soda, or that Annika was playing the claw machine with Gannon's quarters, or that someone had dumped an entire salt shaker out and was licking it off the table (it was Annika).  Thanks for the report, guys.  I didn't previously realize your in insatiable love for micro-justice.  News to me.  I'll get right on the micromanagement of your lives in a booth of a taco joint.  Because you can't self-regulate for 3 freaking minutes.  Seriously.

I finally had Gannon and Siri zoning mindlessly over a game of "Equestria Girls" on my phone, and had Annika on my lap.  Straw to lips.....driiiiinnnnnnkkkkkkkk. Then, mid sarcastic joke about having too many kids to my vice principal, I felt warm.  Warm and damp.  Then dripping in my shoe.  SERIOUSLY!?!?!?!?!?  I GAVE HER QUARTERS TO BE GOOD.  And she peed on my leg.  Great.

I realized in that moment, that this is what being a mom is.  It's sitting with a plat of nachos, a strawberry frozen beverage, and my vice-boss, in a puddle of urine, and acting like it's totally normal.  Shoes.  For the love of God, why isn't she wearing shoes.  "Get your shoes, please, it's time to go home and take a bath."

Home we go.  It's going to be better at home.  We'll have baths, watch a quick show, and fall asleep to be ready bright and early for the Friday of a three day weekend.  The thought was a shadow as I laid in bed with Annika screaming in my left ear that her nose hurts, as Gannon cries in my right ear that he "really really really didn't mean to get his blanket stuck in his ceiling fan".

"Gannon, sit down and be quiet.  Did you turn your fan off?"  Thankfully, over zealous to please Siri is on top of turning off the fan.  "Annika, blow into the napkin so you're nose won't hurt."  *blow* "Oh for the love.  What is that.  Is that a bead?!?!?!"

I'm ready for another drink.

A whole lot of fun and a whole lot of Jesus

Getting the car detailed before we leave

If you don't know about my camping trip, you have to check it out on my other blog, The Jolly Camper.  We're getting ready.  We're making progress on packing.  Laundry piles are starting to dwindle (as much as they can when you have 2 little girls that change outfits 34u2879572389-7 times a day.  Yes I realize there are letters in that number.)  We've been to the bank.  We've been to Target.  We've been back to Target.  We're so close to ready.

The most popular question I get asked is: HOW DO YOU DO IT?

Patience:  I am not a naturally patient person.  In fact, I'm rather impatient.  As a critical care nurse, I like excitement, and I like to see results. Right.  NOW.  Being patient with gas station clerks (I use all cash, so I see a LOT of these people), state park rangers, other campers, TRAFFIC, my very own CHILDREN....the Lord really pushes me to grow in patience over these times. Essential.

Cash: I pay for the trip in cash. We have a set budget that Gordon and I work out months in advance, then I work my TAIL off to be able to play hard.  I have people tell me all the time, "don't work so hard that you forget to live!"  Um, yah.  I'd say taking a month of work totally off to show my kids HALF the country is living.  We follow the teachings of Dave Ramsey and live like no one else, so we can live like no one else.  I drive a $900 car to and from work, we live in a home where our mortgage payment (which will be paid off early) is only a quarter of one of our incomes, we don't eat out.  But by golly, if we want to eat a lobster in Maine, we eat lobster in Maine!

Trust: My husband is a very understanding and trusting man.  He has NO problem "allowing" me to take our kids for a month because, one, he trusts me, and two, he trusts the benefit of our kids getting to travel and experience.  THANK YOU, Gordon for trusting me with our precious little people :)

Flexibility: Yes, I plan.  Yes, there is an itinerary, but wow, it is fluid.  We know the places we want to stop, but if a local tells us to do something different, we go.  If somewhere we go sucks, we leave.  If we want to spend an extra day somewhere because it is amazing, we do.  This works in with my section on "patience."  A. Lot.

Stupidity/Bravery: Honestly, I haven't' figured out where camping with 4 kids over a month falls on the stupid/brave spectrum.  It's probably right in the middle, which is about right for me.  But the pay off is so so so so so so so so so worth it!

Jesus:  We try to keep Jesus as the center of our home.  And our van.  That makes everything I listed above possible.  Without a heart of Love, the peace that surpasses all understanding, the fruit of the spirit, and finances that honor God first, this whole thing goes up in smoke.  If I have to pull off the side of the road  because Gannon just won't stop kicking the seat because he's mad that Siri got to pick the last movie and Annika can't fall asleep for her nap because Gannon is kicking and Siri is crying and I'm yelling and Kayleigh is wondering WHAT in the world is going on, we pull over.  And we pray.  And we ask for forgiveness from each other, from our Lord, and we ask Jesus to remind us that HE created all the things we have set out to see, and HE created our beautiful little family that I love SO much, and HE is the one we praise for eternity.

That's about it.  Everything else is a fly by the seat of our pants adventure which is the fun part!  Hope you enjoy following The Jolly Camper over the next month.  Read, Comment, Share, SUBSCRIBE, and Enjoy!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  

TOMORROW, WE RIDE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Sweet Dreams Little Man

As a mom, sometimes I want to know what is going on in my kids brain....what they are thinking about, what is on their heart, what is dear to them.  I hope all parents want this, because this is what makes us probe into their lives, ask them questions, and KNOW our children.

One of the most precious times to hear what your children think about is when they are right on the brink of sleep.  Either falling asleep or waking up is a magical time in the mind of a child.
The beauty of their sleepy little words aren't ever a disappointment.

This morning, I was waking Gannon up to get ready for church, and we had such a moment.

I softly patted his leg and whispered, "Good morning, Gannon."  He wiggled a bit and snuggled deeper into his covers.  I patted his bottom from on top of his comforter, "It's time to wake up!"
"Mom, stop, I'm praying."  My heart almost burst with joy.  I sat down next to him, stroked his hair and inquired.  "What are you praying about, sweetie?"

"Maple ice cream.  Maple ice cream with blue gobbey gross things in it.  And swimming."

Faces

I was looking through my camera the other day, needing to upload some of the 2000 pictures I have of our travels over the past year.  
You can view those on my blog The Jolly Camper

Here are some of the "Selfies" I found.  

For your viewing pleasure, Ladies and Gents...

Literally

There are kids who are good at vocabulary, and there are kids that are good at language, and then there is Gannon.  Gannon is articulate, he has a fantastic vocabulary, and Gannon has difficulty interpreting literal language.  Gannon also has a great friend, Jaidn, that has difficulty interpreting literal language.  You can check them out in real life on their YouTube Channel, The Rabbit Holes.  Really.  Hearing Jaidns voice adds a TON.  This story is about the two boys.

(Watching T-Bone Dance)

We were awesomely blessed by our dear friends the Warrens with tickets to the San Antonio Rampage Hockey Game.  WOOHOO!!!!!!!!  AT&T Center, great seats, great friends.  Since they got tickets, we got snacks, 'cus that's how we roll in the WarNig (Warren-Koenig) family.  We got beer. We got popcorn.  We got A sprite.  One, unlimited sprite.  Now, I've told you about the Warrens before.  They have 5 awesome offspring whom we love to death.  Those five plus our three littles are quite a group, and they were being asked to share ONE sprite.

(Gannon and Mommy)

Gannon and Jaidn were a bit perturbed that the girls were sucking down the sprite like it was the sweet nectar of the Gods.  I tried to reassure them that there would be plenty. 

"Guys, it's a bottomless drink, don't worry, there's more where that came from!"


They stopped.  It was going to be ok.


5 minutes passed.


It was no longer OK.


Gannon seemed upset.  I inquired, then listed to the exchange of literal thinkers:


Me:  What's the matter, bud?


Gannon:  Well, if the drink is bottomless, how does it even hold the drink?!?!?!


Jaidn:  Gannon, the drink isn't ACTUALLY bottomless.  I checked!

WarrNig Klan :)

The N Word. Kind Of.

Gannon has a Facebook.  He is (normally) very monitored.  Saturday night, I won Mom of the Year award for falling asleep while Gannon was on my computer.  Bad bad bad bad bad bad BAD idea.  

I didn't know right away that something had gone awry.

Headed into church on Sunday, a dear friend approached me.  "Did she respond?" she inquired.  I gave a rather blank look as I had NO idea who was responding to what.  

"T (we'll call her)!  Did she respond to Gannon's Facebook post?"

Gannon was no where to be seen.  Probably trying to download games on the "Giving Kiosk"  

Lord Mercy. 

 I started to sweat.  My face got red.  

This could not be good.  

I went for my phone. 

 I scrolled through Gannon's account.  Nothing incriminating.  A few Toby Mac references.

I went to T's account.  

I scrolled.  

And I found this post:

To which Gannon responded.....

We're still waiting to find out.

Banana Bread

Gannon loves to bake.  He also hates to sleep.  This can be a dangerous equation.  We've woken up to some very interesting messes, and some very unique recipes have been created in the wee hours in the Koenig home.
It had been some time since Gannon had tapped into his culinary juices.

2:00 AM
Gannon:  BurstS into the bedroom, using his inside voice.  His inside voice is LOUD.  "MOM MOM MOM MOM MOM!  WAKE UP, THE BANANA BREAD IS ALMOST READY!!!!"
Me:  Blurry eyed, but somehow wide awake, "What banana bread, Gannon?"
Gannon:  THE ONE I MADE YOU!  COME LOOK!
Me: Follows Gannon downstairs.  Finds the oven at 450* with this inside...

Yes, that is a plastic bowl.

On the positive side, he DID have most of the ingredients right, right? *Yawnnnnnnnnnn